So below is a copy of the devotional that I gave. I left it in "speech" form, so as you are reading it, that's why it sounds like I'm talking to you. The resources I used were Matthew Henry's Commentary on the Whole Bible, .Kevin Swanson's Family Bible Study series on the Psalms, and my own personal study of the scriptures. After the devotion, there is a list of a few of our favorite resources.
Before you begin, open your Bible to Psalm 144 and read it.... ENJOY!!!
May our daughters be like
palace cornerstones...
Psalm 144
This Psalm is a Psalm of
faith: in God's provisions, promises, and protections. We are going
to look at a few different aspects of this Psalm, but focus mainly on
verse 12. Towards the end of the Psalm, we see David (who represents
a type of Christ) praying for two main topics: 1. a faithful
progeny/future generation and 2. prosperity for the nation. Certainly
(as indicated) a people are truly blessed whose God is the Lord! God
has made promises about faithful posterity and prosperity in many
places in scripture and we see here that David prays for those things
already promised. Keep that in mind, as this applies directly to us
as well.
We are going to focus (in
the first place) on verse 12: “Our daughters as corner pillars cut
for the structure of a palace”.
When I do an in depth study,
I generally go to a lexicon and Bible dictionaries and study the
words in the original language. I'm not a Greek or Hebrew scholar,
so those are helpful resources. However, in this case I was
disappointed! There were no rich goldmines, synonyms, or deep
thoughts for the word cornerstone or cornerpillar. Basically, what
you see is what you get. So then I had to ask myself: What is the
function of a cornerstone, and how does that apply to our girls? A
cornerstone is an integral part of the foundation (of a palace in
this case), and it helps hold together two walls. Like I said:
nothing earthshattering here.... But how does this apply to our
daughters? We are going to talk a bit about two different ways our
daughters function as cornerstones. I'm sure there are more, but time
is going to constrain us to just two. As I speak of each of these
functions, realize that when I say “daughters”, I'm referring to
GROWN UP DAUGHTERS who are (hopefully) functioning as cornerstones.
So picture your little girls in your mind and fast forward a decade
or two as we look at their future roles.
***CORNERSTONES BETWEEN TWO
FAMILIES:
Matthew Henry said that by
daughters, two families are united and connected to their mutual
strength. It took me awhile to decide if I agreed with that or not,
because at first thought it seems like the man as head of the family
would be the one binding families together. However, after reflecting
upon my experience (which I'm not trying to promote as a method of
Bible study), it is the daughter/wife who has the power to bring
families together or drive and keep a wedge between them. Think of
families you know which have been filled with strife. Is it the son
or the daughter that typically resists reconciliation and
relationship? We certainly don't want to raise daughters who are
easily offended, hold grudges, or who are unforgiving and selfish. We
want them to exhibit 1 Cor. 13 love and to be humble peacemakers. As
anyone who has been married for any length of time knows, there are
ample opportunities for offenses, discord, and for Satan to work in
the in-law relationship. We want to raise our daughters to do
everything in their power to bring Christlike unity into the
inter-family relationships. In Romans 12, we are told that “as much
as it depends upon you, live peaceably with all” and also “repay
no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the
sight of all”. So after reflecting, I agree with Matthew Henry, our
daughters are cornerstones between two families and can strengthen
both of them. ...or tear them apart.
***CORNERSTONES BETWEEN HER
FAMILY AND GOD:
My dear friend and prayer
partner and I were discussing daughters as cornerstones and their
roles within their own families, namely with their husband and
children. The daughter who has now become wife and mother has the
opportunity to be the cornerstone between her family and God. Again,
I'm a firm believer in male headship, and I'm not trying to discount
that. But our daughters as wives have the opportunity to be a
helpmeet to their husbands in a physical and spiritual sense. She can
pray for him, encourage his spiritual walk, and encourage his
accountability with other godly men.... OR NOT. She can be supportive
of him in family worship... OR NOT. I won't go in to a lot of
application on the marriage aspect of this cornerstone since this is
a baby shower and not a bridal shower. But I'm sure you get the idea.
But another major arena in
which our daughters have the opportunity to be a cornerstone is the
influence that they have upon their children. Even if they work
outside the home, and especially if they stay home and/or homeschool
their children, our daughters' impact on that next generation is hard
to overestimate.
Again, as I'm speaking of
daughters, we are still looking into the future at what role we see
them performing. In the physical sense, the daughter is the one who
will decide how nutritious of food she will feed her family: fast
food, pre-made, gummi-worms, fresh, organic, whole, frozen, etc...
She will decide how they are clothed, bathed, or how clean the house
is kept, etc... In the spiritual sense, the daughter (who is with the
children most of the time) will either actively or passively
determine what goes into the hearts and minds of her children. Will
she lead them to God? Or away from God? What kind of story books will
she read to her babies? What is the worldview behind the toys she
allows into her home? What kinds of songs will she sing to them? Will
they be babysat by the TV? What kind of shows will she let them
watch? What will she do during naptime? Will she fill her own mind
with godly, nourishing things or soap operas? Proverbs 14:1 says: The
wisest of women builds her house, but folly with her own hands tears
it down.
As you can see, our
daughters' influence on the next generation is very great.
Discernment must not only be made between right and wrong, but
between right and almost right. Will our daughters be a cornerstone
between their families and God? That is what we pray. That is what
David prayed.
Now that we have looked at a
deeper meaning of the word “cornerstone”, we need to glean some
truth from the 2nd part of this verse.
ESV – cut for the
structure of a palace
NAS – fashioned as for a
palace
NIV84 – carved to adorn a
palace
NKJV – sculptured in
palace style
KJV – polished after the
similitude of a palace
We see words like cut,
fashioned, carved, sculptured, and polished. Notice that the
cornerstone wasn't just picked up out of the quarry and set into the
foundation. There was a lot of work done to it to get it prepared
“just right”. In the same sense, when God gives us our daughters
as little 6ish pound packages all bundled in pink, cute and perfect
as they are, they are hardly fit or prepared to be a cornerstone.
When I speak of “daughters” from here on out, I no longer am
referring to them as the grown up product. I'm referring to them in
their current state as diamonds in the rough who need to be prepared.
There is much work to do and a whole lot of “fashioning” to
accomplish. As firm believers in God's sovereignty, predestination,
and His hidden will, we must not make the grave mistake of neglecting
His revealed will, especially in the bringing up of our children. God
gives us many promises and instructions for raising our children in
His word. We need to cling to these, pray over these, and seek wisdom
in implementing them, because this process of fashioning will be a
real battle, in fact, a war.
Going back to the beginning
and rest of the Psalm, we see that God is the one who has ultimately
defeated the enemy and allowed David to triumph. BUT, we also see
that despite that, God TRAINED David's hands, even his fingers, for
the war. DON'T MISS THIS: God won the battle. God trained David to
fight. It applies to us... particularly in the battle for the hearts
and minds of our children. We have to actively be fighting: on our
knees and in our decisions and actions. Thankfully we have the
entirety of Scripture before us, to guide us, to train us. Our pastor
has been preaching on Eph. 6, and it is very applicable in preparing
us for the battle.
This brings us to the next
truth in raising our children/daughters: THERE WILL BE A WAR! THERE
IS A WAR! Unfortunately, not every parent recognizes this fact, and
to miss it is a costly error. According to this Psalm, who or what is
the enemy? Those whose mouths speak lies and whose right hand swears
falsely. In our culture, we are bombarded with false teachers, false
Christs, false gospels, and very inviting ½ truths. Discerning the
enemy is not easy. Remember that Satan disguises himself as an angel
of light. And we can find him in our movies, TV shows, advertising,
educational systems, books, music, the liberal left, even in twisting
scripture... But that's nothing new, there is nothing new under the
sun.... We need to be prepared and fight the battle well for the
hearts and minds of our children and daughters as we endeavor to cut,
polish, fashion, and sculpt them to one day be palace cornerstones.
***Application – How do we
apply this to our daily lives?
- Immerse yourself in the truth!
-Daily read God's Word.
*Always be systematically
reading through the whole Bible! The pace doesn't matter so much
as that you are constantly working through it in a scheduled manner:
once/year, twice/year, once every two years, etc... You CAN do
this. I prefer using the chronological plan.
-Be studying passages in
depth.
Regularly do topical
studies, spend time on what your pastor is preaching on, use
resources like Ligonier online, listen to teachings available on
SermonAudio, etc...
-Memorize Scripture –
long and short passages... YES YOU CAN!
Memorize with a friend,
memorize with your children, memorize passages that will help you
in areas of temptation in your life, etc...
-Know the truth about God –
Study Good Doctrine
WSC, Westminster
Confession of Faith, Knowledge of the Holy by Tozer, AW Pink's
Attributes of God. The scriptures warn us of thinking that God is
like us. Know his attributes! Beware of cotton candy theology!
This is where Satan easily invades our minds and hearts with stuff
that sounds good and sounds biblical... but is not! Don't get
sucked in by your emotions!
- Be vigilant about what is coming into your home!
Titus 2:5 uses a word that
means working at home/keepers of the home/guard of the home. You are
the guarding over what in entering into your domain. What are you
letting in? Where is Satan deceiving you? ---TV, movies, books,
people, devices, clothing, music, toys... What is the worldview
behind them? Remember how Absalom stole the heart of David's people?
Don't let “well meaning” and seemingly innocent things come and
steal your daughters' hearts.
*Example – what are the roots of Barbie? Did you know she was
modeled after a doll sold as an adult novelty in Germany? She was
sold in bars, tobacco shops, and adult themed toy stores. Does
she portray a model of a polished cornerstone that we want our
daughters to emulate?
YOU NEED TO KNOW YOUR ENEMY
AND BE EVER SO WATCHFUL AS HE TRIES TO INVADE!!!
- Have a vision – know why you are doing what you are doing and convey that to your children. This helps protect against legalism where you have the actions without the heart behind it. Why do we learn to read? So we can read God's word. Why do we learn to write? So we can write about God's Word to others. Why do we learn to speak well? So we can accurately tell others about the gospel. Why do we memorize scripture? So we will not sin against God.....
- Don't underestimate the ability of your kids!
-Matthew Henry learned to
read early and was reading the Bible independently at 3 years
old.
-The WSC was written for
children! Yet we have striven to make it easier and condensed it
into just a few words. Our little kids are capable of memorizing it.
-Have your kids memorize
scripture – even long passages! Have a systematic review
system in place. Every kid is different, but they are capable of a
lot! My 7 year old has several chapters and verses memorized...
including the entire sermon on the mount.
-Lack of diligence on the
parent's end tends to be what limits our children... it isn't their
lack of ability.
- Teach them wholesome songs: The Psalter and Great hymns, set scripture to music
-We all know the power of
music. What lyrics do you want flowing through your daughter's mind
throughout the day? Truths about God? Or the indoctrinations of man?
Don't be fooled into thinking that there isn't an agenda behind
things like Disney's “Frozen” and “Let it Go”.
- Read them Good Literature/ Provide them with Good Literature and Godly heroes/role models.
-Hudson Taylor, John
Paton, Gladys Alward, Amy Carmichael, and Elizabeth Elliot are
much better role models than Superwoman.
- Bathe them in prayer and cling to the promises God has given to us in His Word.
This is not easy, it is not
for the faint hearted, and it is EXHAUSTING! Sometimes battling Satan
feels like the game Whack-a-Mole. You win one victory and he
immediately rears his head in another arena. Persevere, Sisters! Each
minute spent discipling your daughter is effectively fashioning her
to be the polished cornerstone God is calling her to be.
So I'm asking all of you
grown women here: Are you polished cornerstones between your families
and God? Between your extended and in-law families?
And as mothers,
grandmothers, and mentors, are you actively polishing these little
daughters in our midst to be palace cornerstones?
Recommended Resources:
Standing on the Promises –
Douglas Wilson
With the Children on Sundays
– Sylvanus Stall
Knowledge of the Holy –
Tozer
The Attributes of God – AW
Pink
The Child's Book on
Repentance – Thomas Gallaudet
Christian Heroes Then and
Now series – Janet and Geoff Benge
Hero Tales – Dave and Neta
Jackson
Training Hearts Teaching
Minds – Starr Meade
Family Driven Faith –
Voddie Bauchum
Shepherding a Child's Heart
– Ted Tripp
Leading Little Ones to God –
Schoolland
The Ology – Machowski
Large Family Logistics –
Brenneman
The Shaping of a Christian
Family – Elizabeth Elliot
Truth and Grace Memory Books
Dangerous Journey ---- a
beautifully illustrated version of the Pilgrim's Progress
WSC set to music – Holly
Dutton
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